Found on the Internet, Number 19

It has something to do with Sweden and Finland.  I know what he's thinking.

The Kardashians

For some reason or other, I am addicted to Keeping Up with the Kardashians.  The characters are strangely sympathetic in their triviality.  I especially like Kim, who seems to be the nicest.  The mother seems to have a K.K. initial mania, naming her daughters Kim, Khloe, and Kourtney.  Only one was spelled in the usual way.

Funny Yoga Pose I

Flow Chart for Choosing Your College Major

Is It Unchristian to Do Yoga?

This is a cause of anxiety among some of the Baptist brethern -- that people in studying yoga are implicitly buying into Eastern religions like Hinduism.  Maybe it's the focus on bodily experience; if that's the case, then getting a good exercise workout produces the same kinds of results.  Or maybe it's the greeting, "Namaste."  Or possibly chanting the mantra "Ommmm . . . . "

Isn't tolerance and curiosity supposed to be Christian virtues too?  Why should peple be scared little bunnies?

Happy Thanksgiving!

The Sin Discovery Efforts of Holy Moley

Holy Moley, our itenerant Fundamentalist minister and universal scold, has been working diligently in making American life more pious than it presently is.  We really should commend him for his efforts.  Here are some new discoveries in sinfulness, you imperfect sinners!

1.  A dating couple should refrain from going bare-footed together.  As a matter of fact, the wearing of open-toed shoes by women is a temptation to unsuspecting guys.  Seeing a bare toe or more can be too much.

2.  Chocolate is too pleasureable.  Therefore, it must be wocked!

3.  Sleeping late indicates a disorganized life.  Getting up after 7:30 A.M. is giving into sloth.

4.  Watching Fox News or ESPN is a near occasion to sin, due to the attractiveness of the reporters.  Watch MSNBC or NBC sports, instead.

5.  Japanese anime is a temptation.

6.  Serving chili without spaghetti is self-indulgent.  The sin of gluttony has been committed.

7.  Christian women should never shower with their husbands.  Showering with the preacher . . . . . it's okay if thou is comely.

Girls Can Fart Too!

It's pure sexism to pretend that we shouldn't.  After all, what the gander can do, the goose should be able too also.  It can definitely break the ice at parties.

And. guess what?  When someone is called an "old fart," it can be a she as well as a he.  As a matter of fact, why not start early, and be a young fart?

Remember Your Guardian Angel

Don't make her disappointed in you!

Magazine Hoarders

I know of several people who can't bear to part with their magazines.  Now I see boxes and boxes of old National Geographics, which apparently a person or her/his family or his/er executioner finally in desperation had to part with.  And, having old Consumer Reports might be valuable to review possible purchases.  We do have to accept that geeks are not known for neatness.  Therefore, beaucoup copies of Wired simply is part of the geek role.  But enormous collections of certain magazines may tell too much about a person.  Don't you find that a guy that has more than one Maxim in his apartment might have lost some luster?  I asked other women; they use terms like "desperate," "pituful," "weird," "pathetic," and other words for that possible situation.

On the other hand, having a closet for my Cosmos is just for convenience in storage!

The F-M-K Game

It's also called "Fuck, Marry, Kill."  This is a schoolgirls' game in which a player is given three figures in pop culture or history.  The player is to choose one that she would fuck, but only once, one that she would marry (but not do it), and one to kill.

Okay, which one would you F-M-K? 

Catherine of Aragon, Anne Boelyn, Catherine Howard?

Thomas Jefferson, John Adams, James Madison?

Katherine Hepburn, Joan Crawford, Ingrid Bergman?

Randolph Scott, John Wayne, Jimmy Stewart?

I deliberately used trios of non-living folks, so none of the three possible choices could be exercised.  But you could do this with political figures or celebrities.  However, the rules require that you could kill only one of the three!

An Example of French Savoir Faire

Carla Bruni is both elegant and sexy, truly an elegant First Lady!

Found on the Internet, Number 18

Schlimmbesserung

'Schlimmbesserung' is a German word that describes an improvement that makes things worse.  Those Germans are deep thinkers; this is intuitively a very useful concept. 

I Want This!

Let's have breast enhancement surgery covered by Obamacare.  What a great idea!  

How Californians See America

Found On the Internet, Number 17

Nao of the Oranges

I'd love to have a swimsuit like this one.

Men Who Wear Bow Ties Are Sexy!

Ahhh . . . . guys with bow ties evoke interest to me.  There's something of the old-fashioned inhibition reflected in their choice of neckwear.  Let's face, ascot-wearers make you think of country club preppy snobbery, ostentatious flaunting of style, and general prissiness.  The turtle neck sweater wearers come across as studied nonconjformists.  Do they have a publication out there called Nonconformists' Fashion Monthly?  Open-necked rugby shirt guys are athletic.  And guys that wear standard neckties, what about them?  Could they be subtlely suggesting the possible length of something else with this choice of neckwear, much like Hummer drivers imply something else about themselves?

Men who wear bow ties are so understated.  They come across as shy, reflective, refined, careful, and interesting.  Can there be a tiger under their facade that needs releasing?  If that is the case, then it becomes a challenge to tame that kitty!

Found on the Internet, Number 16

Veterans Day

Honoring those who served.  Thanks, guys!

The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald -- Whole Version

The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down
Of the big lake they call Gitche Gumee
The lake, it is said, never gives up her dead
When the skies of November turn gloomy.

With a load of iron ore - 26,000 tons more
Than the Edmund Fitzgerald weighed empty
That good ship and true was a bone to be chewed
When the gales of November came early

The ship was the pride of the American side
Coming back from some mill in Wisconsin
As the big freighters go it was bigger than most
With a crew and the Captain well seasoned.

Concluding some terms with a couple of steel firms
When they left fully loaded for Cleveland
And later that night when the ships bell rang
Could it be the North Wind they'd been feeling.

The wind in the wires made a tattletale sound
And a wave broke over the railing
And every man knew, as the Captain did, too,
T'was the witch of November come stealing.

The dawn came late and the breakfast had to wait
When the gales of November came slashing
When afternoon came it was freezing rain
In the face of a hurricane West Wind

When supper time came the old cook came on deck
Saying fellows it's too rough to feed ya
At 7PM a main hatchway caved in
He said fellas it's been good to know ya.

The Captain wired in he had water coming in
And the good ship and crew was in peril
And later that night when his lights went out of sight
Came the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.

Does anyone know where the love of God goes
When the waves turn the minutes to hours
The searchers all say they'd have made Whitefish Bay
If they'd put fifteen more miles behind her.

They might have split up or they might have capsized
They may have broke deep and took water
And all that remains is the faces and the names
Of the wives and the sons and the daughters.

Lake Huron rolls, Superior sings
In the ruins of her ice water mansion
Old Michigan steams like a young man's dreams,
The islands and bays are for sportsmen.

And farther below Lake Ontario
Takes in what Lake Erie can send her
And the iron boats go as the mariners all know
With the gales of November remembered.

In a musty old hall in Detroit they prayed
In the Maritime Sailors' Cathedral
The church bell chimed, 'til it rang 29 times
For each man on the Edmund Fitzgerald.

The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down
Of the big lake they call Gitche Gumee
Superior, they say, never gives up her dead
When the gales of November come early.
Gordon Lightfoot

The Bird Poo Act

The Guano Islands Act (48 U.S.C. ch. 8 §§ 1411-1419) was passed by the U.S. Congress on August 18, 1856. It enables American citizens to take possession of islands containing guano deposits: in effect, bird poo. The islands can be located anywhere, so long as they are not occupied and not within the jurisdiction of other governments. It also empowers the U.S. President to use the military to protect such interests, and establishes the criminal jurisdiction of the United States.

Statue-Fondling Recognized in the Print Media

There's an article in the New York Times, of all sources, that addresses this concern.  Here's the link:

http://cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/10/21/an-attention-getter-irresistibly-interactive/?ref=nyregion

Anyway, the object of interest is a 12-foot statue of Adam by artist Fernando Botero in front of the mall at the Time-Warner Center.  He's obviously nude; and people:

". . . . often touch, grasp, pat or rub the statue’s small but prominent penis, while a friend or relative takes a photo."

It's a relief to know that I'm not the only one that wishes to check out a statue's dick sometimes.  But I suspected that some guys like to play with boobs on statues, as deduced from the shiny breasts on otherwise patinized bronze statues of nude women.

Clearly, this is not something you can do in Peoria, IL.  However, I'll bet that there are lots of us out there that would like to check out someone's real factory-installed equipment, and not just simply think about it.

But how to begin?  You can't just go up to someone on the street and ask.

Logical Consequences

--from Graph Jam (http://graphjam.com)

Rhode Island Keeps Its State Name

There's an irony in the fact that the smallest state happens to have the longest name.

Rhode Island is formally called "The State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations." The name appears in the colony's 1663 Royal Charter and is on the state seal and many official documents.  This name came from the merger of Roger Williams' "Providence Plantations" settlement with some nearby towns.

On Tuesday, Rhode Island voters voted to keep the full name, rather than to dock it to mere "Rhode Island."

Not bad for a state with a chicken named for it.

Found on the Internet, Number 15

Sleeping With the Political Opposition

People say that opposites attract; and there may be some truth to this.  What better way to test wheher this is the case than to deliberately seek out someone with a differing political philosophy to see whether this holds true.  After all, there are known cases of political commentary persons who are married to people with an opposite point of view.  Maybe they've discovered a way to generate some sizzle through their differences?

Imagine if you're a liberal woman, and you're embraced with a red state guy in some good old-fashioned Republican canoodling in the missionary position?  Or how about you being conservative, and discovering with some New York or San Franciscan liberal guy the joys of unfettered monkey sex, maybe even without clothing?

Well, you can work up to that, eventually.  Even doing so in your mind is liberating.

But think of what this frank exchange of views and other things would have in terms of national healing!  Marvin Gaye would be proud!

Prom Orientation

That old high school rite of passage, the Prom, has been further updated.  Some schools are now featuring orientation sessions in anticipation of this night of collective excess and bliss.  Will attendance be required?  Will having attended this orientation be marked on a student's transcript? 

High school administrators already monitor what sort of prom dress a girl can wear, and the occasional butch lesbian may be forbidden to wear a tux when she takes her lipstick lesbian girlfriend.

This is too much!

Dogs and Cats

Found on the Internet, Number 14

Sometimes there are surprising architectural features in unlikely places.  This one is especially attractive, in my opinion.